No more Burl Ives for ten more months: it truly is the most wonderful time of the year.
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A comfortable cat will often give you a friendly Christmas greeting, like so.
You deploy a latke by taking a bite and then throwing it, which takes considerable self-control, if it’s a good latke.
I’m uploading this from Amtrak, because we live in the future.
I was describing the search for intimacy to my therapist as being like a raffle in which losers get splinters shoved under their fingernails. That’s still a comparison with some validity, but this was what I wasn’t taking into account.
The thing about me is that I don’t make dumb puns like this in real life. It comes out only here. If I hadn’t become a cartoonist I would never have known this particular thing about myself.
Back in the day it was only “the type that might kill you” and “the type that probably won’t.” All those people walking around today with like hepatitis G are a bunch of posers.
Dr. King said, “We’ll wear you down by our capacity to suffer.” W. H. Auden said, “The habit-forming pain,/Mismanagement and grief:/We must suffer them all again.” They are both right today.
When I was a kid Halloween was for kids. Now that I’m an adult it’s evidently for adults. It’s following me.